The price of fish

There is some concern here over the rising cost of the petroleum derivative known locally as 'gasoline' or 'gas' (in contrast to 'gas' which is now also used to fuel vehicles and which, to avoid confusion with the shortened form of gasoline, is often referred to via the longened form 'natural gas'. Makes sense.)
I have to admit I hadn't been giving it much thought, what with the price being so ridiculously, fantastically cheap compared to the real world (where the dragons and commies are, doing their freedom hating and bereft of proper religion and morals) that I just fill up wherever and whenever; I had been considering running my cellphone off it and giving my vacuum cleaner a miniaturised V6.
However as people who weren't punished for their parents' sins by being born outside America know, cheap gasoline is a constitutional right and a vital component of functioning, healthy, democracy in that it allows one to drive three hours for a really good cheeseburger.

While in a DC hotel room, struck down by conferencitis, I took the opportunity to flick through the cable news channels (I don't own a tv*). It was a holiday weekend so most were covering the fuel apocalypse, because holiday isn't just a state of mind, it's a place you drive to.
One news crew had gamely spent some money on gas and driven their van out to a gas station forecourt to interview the hard pressed populace on how they were coping with the breakdown of civilisation. One woman, a decent salt-of-the-earth type with pearlised smile and dyed hair, was asked if the price of fuel was affecting her? "Oh yes definitely." she affirmed, standing beside her large black SUV. How so? "Well we've been cutting down on unnecessary trips, and trying to combine others when we run errands."
Imagine that.

Plenty of Americans do recognise that 'climate change' might not be a purposeless liberal socialist science conspiracy but a genuine possibility, and that declining reserves mean that the price of fuel can only increase on average. They tend to buy smaller cars of Asian origin with high fuel economy. Recently hybrids have become very popular, but some older, more efficient options remain overlooked. Diesel engines? Buses? What are you, from space?

The price of gas is very serious though for those whose livelihood depends directly on it. Taxi drivers, who have to give half their takings to the dispatcher, but pay for fuel out of their own half, like to tell me this when I happen to require their services, before they mention that only tips can keep the wolves from the door. Wolves who have been forced to work in the repossessions sector because of the poor economy and dwindling number of buffalo. As one driver recently related to me "You might drive almost an hour and end up with only twenty bucks, but that's before you've bought gas for this," indicating his car, an ex-police Ford Crown Victoria, which he lovingly referred to as a "piece of shit." The primary benefit of the Crown Victoria is its powerful engine and easily rebuilt body. Useful for a hard day hurtling down alleys knocking over boxes and trashcans or chasing the Dukes of Hazzard. Or for casually ramming other cars and converting cyclists into flying objects, as taxis are want to do. Not known for its fuel economy, the basic unit on the Crown Vic's fuel gauge is the daily oil output of a small Sultanate.
Later the driver pulled over at the side of the road, cocked his finger and pretended to shoot some deer. Then he offered to take me bear hunting.

It seems that taxi drivers think gas prices are controlled entirely by the American economy: global financial crises and civil unrest in the Middle East are largely irrelevant. Accordingly, they know how to fix the economy. Along with malaria, homosexuality, seasonal affective disorder and socks lost in the wash, it is "Obama's fault" TM. All of the stimulus money should have just been divided among the people. For a start, this would allow taxi drivers to pay off their "$5000 credit card debt."
It is not clear to me why Barack Obama should take financial advice from people who have unfortunately managed to get themselves into thousands of dollars of debt.

*A lady from the cable company phoned me to tell me about how their great offers could save me money on my tv bill. When she asked who my current tv provider was and I replied that it was no one and that I didn't own a tv, she became very quiet. I could imagine her hitting the panic button, or perhaps just whispering, "freak". It's probably got me on some kind of watch list.